Never Look Back: Chapter 2

Porter sat down on a wooden bench adjacent to the woman's clothes section. The bench was stiff and uncomfortable, it shifted with a loud creak as he landed. The mall was crowded that day, an overwhelmed mother attempted to control her two children just a few feet to his left, and to his right a wife blabbed to her husband about suburban affairs that he took no interest in. The area was obnoxious, the air held a crowded vibe that Porter took no liking to.

But he didn't care about any of that.

His arms rested on his knees as he gazed up at the most perfect girl in the world. Alice was looking at a pink shirt, her face was adorably indecisive as she contemplated her liking of the shirt. She bit her lip as she ran her hands across the cloth. Porter felt a indescribable feeling in his stomach, one that tingled and bothered at him while he sat there, but he didn't wish it away. Instead he took a deep breath of the fresh air that was undoubtably plagued with love.

She was so beautiful. To most, she was an average looking girl, her breasts weren't sizable, and she didn't have the face of a movie star. Her body was average at best, her butt was fit and adorable, but wasn't one that would turn heads. But to him. To him she blew away any other girl in existence. It was as if she had his heart locked in a chokehold that was unbreakable no matter how hard the resistance. Her eyes shimmered a beautiful blue as she studied the clothes, one after the other. Her face slightly twisted as she was in her own world, she would bite her lip every now and again, and her tongue would stick out slightly as she fumbled with the cloth in her hands. Porter smirked to himself stupidly, he studied her, every little thing about her he found likable in some way. Alice mouthed words to herself as she found something she liked or disliked, and she went up on her tip toes for a brief moment whenever she got excited.

Alice was dressed in jeans that were too small on her. This caused her butt to look extra appealing to Porter, but still, he knew they were uncomfortable to her. Porter knew that Alice's father had always been extremely strict on what she wore. She could never wear anything above the top of her knees, and her shoulders always had to be covered. He controlled everything. To make things worse, he would rarely go shopping for her, and would never let her go shopping herself. So the things she wore usually were out of style and tight fitting. Porter felt it would be nice to take her shopping on their first day on the road.

It was late, around 7 o'clock, and the day was coming to a close. They haven't traveled far since leaving their town, their day was spent going out and preparing for the adventure that surely would soon ensue.

Suddenly, Alice's face lit up. She silently gasped and her eyebrows flew up in excitement, her adorable mouth formed a circle as she reached for a blue shirt. After she pulled it off the hanger, she turned to Porter and posed. She held the shirt out in front of her, over her clothes that she was already wearing, and let a jovial grin spread across her face.

"Do you like it?" She asked with exuberance.

"Well as long as you're in it, it'll be perfect," Porter got up and smiled.

She rolled her eyes at him and turned back towards the rack, "Such a guy thing to say."

"Yeah, but I mean it," he rubbed her shoulders from behind, she now felt a warm sensation come over her body as she felt his hands.

"I'm gonna get it," she stated as her eyes fluttered shut.

"You can buy the whole store if you wanted," Porter said quieter, into her ear.

"You should probably get some sweatpants," he added, "Something comfortable, ya know?"

"Yeah, good idea," she agreed, but her mind was somewhere else, "I want these."

Alice reached for some short shorts. Jeans that were cut so that they barely got to the top of her thighs. "Really?" Porter raised his eyebrows with a smirk, "Doesn't seem like you."

"My dad would never let me get things like that," she murmured, seemingly to herself.

Porter felt terrible, and thought of a comforting thing to say as she suddenly began taking more of the short shorts off the shelves. She took every single one in her size.

Alice threw them all in the cart, and then turned to Porter with a comforting halfhearted grin. He smiled back, nothing needed to be said after that. Both understood.

He leaned down and kissed her. She felt a burst of emotion explode inside her. No one has ever understood her like he has, and no one ever will.

"I'll go get us a room," he whispered, "You buy all the revealing clothes you want."

She nodded, and he turned to walk off in the other direction, towards the hotel across the street.

Porter tapped his finger on the front desk of the hotel he was checking into. He had ADD, and was already impatient despite only waiting for a few minutes. He soon was deep in his thoughts, surprisingly, the daunting ones were drowned out but the ones of Alice. As long as he had that girl, he felt like anything was possible.

"Sir?" Porter looked up, a woman in a uniform was standing in front of him, he must have spaced out.

"Oh, hi," he smiled politely, "I'd like a room please."

Porter hated social situations, he always had. He never went to parties, nor did he enjoy going to school. But the thing about Porter was that despite his great dislike for such things, he was excessively charismatic. He was one of the most likable boys in the world, yet hated attention and crowded areas.

The girl was attractive, she had golden hair that was tied up, and her uniform seemed on the verge of splitting where her breasts were. Porter took peeks when he could. "Alright," she began to look at the computer, "Did you make a reservation?"

"No ma'am, I did not," he said coolly as he leaned up against the desk, her perfume filled his nose as he got closer.

"Okay," she typed a bit, "Now what's a fine piece of man like you staying in a hotel all alone?"

She looked up and spoke seductively, Porter bit his lip as he looked down with a smile. He pictured fucking her. God it was hot. But quickly shut that down.

You got Alice, you can't be thinking about that stuff anymore, he thought to himself as he looked back up.

"Actually, I'm staying with my wife," he said confidently.

Wife, he didn't know why he said it, it just felt right. He thought it would be a good idea to play some roles.

"Wife, huh?" She said as she typed away at her computer, "How old are you?"

"24," he answered without hesitation. He was 17, but looked old for his age.

"I don't see no ring on that finger," she countered.

He laughed, "Well nosey, my wife is holding on to it right now."

"Why?"

"Can I get a room, or not?" He said, not being able to find anything else to say. Not one of his finer moments. He felt incredibly stupid when he thought about it in hindsight.

She looked up half suspiciously and half offended, she chewed her gum a few times, "I'll go see, sir."

She walked off into the back room. Porter sighed and looked up at the TV.

He had to double take.

On the TV screen was a picture of Alice and himself side by side. On the bottom of the screen it read, "Two teens on the run after massive theft."

Alice had just checked out of the store. She had bought so many clothes that she had always dreamed of possessing. It was a small thing, but it was more than what it seemed, it made her feel free from the grasps of the terrible monster that had held her captive her whole life. She couldn't wipe the smile off of her face.

Now she sat patiently on a chair facing the center of the store, she was still inside, but on the outskirts near the entrance. Alice ran her hands across her legs, she was wearing the shorts she had just bought. It was strange, but in a good way, she felt defiant towards her father, something she could never be when she lived with him. Not only that, she felt... Sexy. Her muscular legs were exposed in public for the first time, and, for some reason, Alice had the urge to show them off. She felt so alive, and she loved it.

Alice's grinning face turned to the left, she was now conscious of the grin, and made an effort to hide it, she didn't want to look like a crazy person, but she wasn't able to completely, instead she sported a jovial smirk. She was just so happy.

To her left was a policeman. He was a cunning black man with a muscular body. The man was on one knee and was talking to an adorable little white girl with pigtails. Alice bit her lip as she looked at him, he was still a ways away, but she could still see how sharp his jawline was and how defined his arms were.

I wonder how big his dick is, she thought to herself. Then almost yelped out loud because of how shocked she was at her own crude behavior.

Alice for a long time had an overactive sexuality. She was having sexual thoughts before most girls, and masturbated frequently. The thoughts she had when masturbating were wild, she never could limit herself to just guys her age. Girls and grown adults and sometimes even kids younger then her would enter her sexual mind of crazed adventures. There were times in school were she couldn't resist her urges, and did it in the bathroom. She loved getting off. Couldn't get enough of it.

Then her father began molesting her.

She never touched herself after that one night. The night after her mother left.

She was sitting in her room weeping, placed in front of her was the note her mother had left. The note was burned. Her father had attempted to throw it in the fireplace after reading it, in which case she scrambled to retrieve it, burning her own hands while doing so. But she got it. And in terrible grieving read her mother's thoughts in detail. She wrote about how she loved Alice, and wished the best for her, but she could no longer put up with the abuse her spouse inflicted of her everyday. One day hopefully we can meet again... Her mother wrote. But Alice didn't want that. How could she leave me? Alice and her mother always had a quiet relationship, never close and truly there was never love between them. But god how could she leave me?

Surely, if her mother had predicted what would follow for Alice, she would have never left.

The door swung open, and a dark force stood in the doorway. The wretched smell of liquor filled Alice's nose. She recoiled, almost whimpering as she grasped the covers at her side. She was expecting a beating. Running through her mind at the time was how bad of a beating it would be. She hoped not a bad one, maybe he would go easy on me because mom just left? Maybe he would be sympathetic? But she knew that wasn't true. Those optimistic thoughts were on the forefront of her mind, but deep down she knew something bad was coming.

He walked at her with a crisp pace of anger. He reached out and Alice recoiled without any noise. Instead of grabbing her however, he grabbed the note.

He began ripping it up, "Didn't I burn this up?"

Alice didn't respond, instead she sat with her head down, Indian style, on top her bed. By the time he was done the note was in a thousand of pieces on her floor. She was hurt by his actions, but didn't dare to speak up.

A while passed, it was about 2 minutes before Alice tilted her head slightly up, wondering why he hasn't struck her/left yet.

He stared down at her, his face was dark in the shadows. She could see his eyes, blue, like hers. In his eyes were something she has never seen in them before, hurt. A terrible hurt laid in his eyes as he glared down at his daughter.

He spoke, "God fucking dammit," he paused, then his eyes began to change, "You look just like her."

He hit Alice. Harder then he has ever hit her before. She flew backwards, her blood splattered across her white pillows. He then got on top of her. She constantly would think back to that moment, how evil he felt to her. Her stomach would sicken every time she thought of it.

The awful man struck her twice more, both in the ribs. She sputtered out blood as he did so. Then he stopped, for a long while he was stationary on top of her, breathing heavily down on top of her.

Then he grabbed her throat.

He squeezed so hard that oxygen was unable to reach her lungs. Alice slowly began to lose consciousness.

She began to fear for her life.

Then he entered her.

After the initial pain and shock passed, she was then no longer fearful for her life. For now she was okay with dying.

When he was done, he left her lying there motionless. He didn't even look at her as he left. Like she was an object that he no longer had use for.

"You're not aloud to leave here until I say so," is the only thing he said to her before leaving.

She remembers painfully moving to the fetal position, then thinking about how she wanted to die.

Porter, she kept repeating to herself, she just wanted Porter. She wanted to run down to his house and collapse in his arms and tell him everything. Tell him how much she loved him and how she wanted to be with him and how she wanted him to take her away from this man who ruined her childhood. When she was allowed to leave a few days later, she went directly to his house. But was unable to do that. She still couldn't understand why she couldn't.

Alice changed after that. She never masturbated. But it was more than that. She wouldn't think of anybody sexually at all, a person's attractiveness wouldn't even register with her. A couple in the hallway kissing made her wheezy. A sex scene on TV would make her throw up. The idea of sex was ruined for her.

But then Porter came along.

So strange, what he did. Suddenly, Alice wanted to fuck... everything, not only him. She was having thoughts even more than before. She wondered how she switched so quickly. It was him, she knew that, but how?

She bit her lip. Suddenly she felt the urge to go talk to the man. Alice didn't know what she was going to say, but she got up anyways.

She took a few steps forward, the adventurous nature of this event excited her. Once she was in range, she opened her mouth to speak.

"He-" she was grabbed from behind.

"We have to go, Al," Porter said from behind, the urgency in his whisper frightened her a bit.

Did he know what I wanted? Is he mad? Is he going to hit me? She thought to herself almost reflexively.

She turned to look in his eyes, in his deep brown eyes she found love she still wasn't used to. Then felt sickened that she would think those things.

"Let's go," he smiled comfortingly, but still was obviously bothered, he looked at the policeman, "I... Uh... Don't think we should stay in a hotel today."

The two laid under the stars later that night. They were wrapped up in a blanket on the grass next to their parked car. They didn't know where they were, but for the most part it was deserted. All they knew was that they were southeast of their Colorado town, and they were fine with the uncertainty, in fact that welcomed it.

Alice rested her head gently against Porter's chest, for a reason she couldn't name, she loved listening to his heartbeat, it made her feel safe.

"Where are we gonna go, Porter?" She spoke softly, not wanting to violate the peacefulness of the surroundings.

"Where do you wanna go?" He countered while brushing her hair behind her ear.

"Everywhere," she answered, at first while staring up at the stars, then after a pause she looked up at him.

"No problem," he smiled, "Me and you. We'll travel the world."

"Let's go to California first."

"Okay."

"I wanna see the bridge," she was now in her own thoughts.

He smiled and kissed her on the head, she then cuddled closer.

After a while of silence, she broke the silence with an impulsive question, "How mad would I have to make you for you to hit me?"

Porter, who had just relaxed his eyes, immediately had a tornado of confused hurt inside of him.

"Alice..." He noticed how she worded the question. It baffled him.

"I just..." She began.

Porter sat up, shedding her, "I would never hit you, what does that mean how mad? What the fuck does that mean?"

"I..." She couldn't find words, she wasn't usually in these types of situations.

"I would never hit you. How... How could you think I could hit you. I love you more than myself, what are you crazy?" He let out a deflated laugh.

"I don't know," Alice suddenly began crying, she didn't know why. But she couldn't help herself.

Alice was easily set off. This was understandable of course, considering what she's been through. Porter still struggled with avoiding such breakdowns. He shouldn't have said the word crazy.

He grabbed her immediately, "Your fath... That... Fucking monster of a man, what he did to you... It doesn't happen. Not with me. You can't go through life thinking that it's normal for men to hit women. It's not. I would never ever even think about."

"What if I do something really bad," she whimpered, she sounded like a kid, which isn't like her.

"Never," Porter reiterated, "If I ever do you have permission to kill me."

She sniffled.

"This is a 50/50 relationship, Al," he added as he laid back down.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning if I get out of place you gotta put me back into it. Just like I should do with you. And all that can be done without hitting. This isn't the 1950's no more, Al," Porter said, "It's how successful relationships work."

"Alright then, I will," she stated, she didn't quite know what it meant, and couldn't exactly picture herself ever being commanding.

Could you blame her, though? The only relationship she has ever witnessed first hand is her mother and father. Her mother feared her father, and never dared spoke back to him. How could she know what a regular happy relationship looked like?

"Hey," he got her attention, "I love you..."

"I know and I lo..."

"Love is a commitment, it's not just something you say to anybody. When you love somebody, you want to be their guardian, you want to be with them everywhere and anywhere."

"That's how I feel with you," she muttered, still upset.

"I know. Same thing with me. Now try to imagine hitting that person."

"I'm sorry." She got the point.

"Don't apologize," he kissed her, he was hurting inside. He loved this girl so much.

"How can you put up with me? We've both had terrible lives, but it's always you caring for me," she laughed through her tears.

He took a long time to answer, "You were there for me in other ways. Besides, you had it worse than me."

"You have a wall that you hide behind, and I know that. I can tell when you're disturbed, but I rarely can break that fucking wall," she said.

They laid in silence.

"We make me wonder... What's worse: Having what you love taken from you. Or never having something to love in the first place." She stated.

A few days went by before Porter told Alice about his mom's diagnosis.

He didn't know how. He knew she wouldn't understand his pain, she didn't love her parents, and he knew that. So how could she understand? He would think to himself. Besides, he didn't know how to put his pain to words.

2 days after his mom told him she was diagnosed. Alice came over to his house to study for finals.

When they were in his room, he did everything he could to act normal. To not give anything away that his life was crumbling. Because he knew she had it worse, and it felt selfish to act weak when he was supposed to be her armor.

They talked for hours. About the normal stuff, it wasn't any different then their usually days.

How should I tell her? Was echoing in his head throughout the whole time they talked.

I should tell her. He would think, but then he would shake off that idea immediately.

He did this for what seemed like forever. Until he finally decided he would tell her another day.

He let out a long sigh, "Hey, Al.. Who did we buy the Louisiana purchase from again?"

Porter looked up at her. He was leaned up against the wall with his legs spread across the bed, while she was by his feet sitting Indian style. She looked back.

"France," she said, they locked eyes for a exceedingly long time.

Just tell her, he thought.

He opened his mouth. But she spoke.

"Hey, I don't know what's eating you up. But when you're ready to talk, I'm here, you know that."

She looked back at her papers, "Napoleon, just remember him."

How'd she know?

That was the moment when he realized he loved her.

Alice stared out the passenger window as the love of her life drove through a small town. The radio was on, but she wasn't listening to it. Her mind was somewhere else.

It was at that place again. Her hand began to go down her sweatpants.

She let out a satisfied sigh as she looked out the window. As Porter came to a stop at a red light, she noticed someone.

This girl was younger than her, she had red hair that was tied up in a ponytail and a toned body. She didn't see her face, the mysterious girl had her back turned towards her. Her ass was out of this world. Just absolutely incredible.

"Al," Porter looked to his right, "Whatcha doin there?"

Alice began to moan, something she didn't usually do when by herself, but this felt right.

The girl Alice was looking at bent over. Alice climaxed.

She let out a scream. Not a quiet one either. She screamed with passion and intensity. Her baggy pants got wet in the front.

The redhead girl looked at where the scream came from. In which case Alice brought her hand out of her pants and nervously laughed before waving with her hand that was covered in cum.

"Alice," Porter began driving again, "What the fuck was that?" He wasn't angry, just shocked.

"Fuck me, Porter," she said with heavy breaths, "I want to fuck you until I can't fuck you anymore."

"Al," he laughed, overwhelmed by her surprising actions, "What's up with you?"

"Fuck me." She repeated.

"I can't, there's no where to go," he said.

She let out a loud agitated noise before grabbing his dick. He almost lost control of the car when she did so. But she didn't care.

Alice kissed his neck. "Alice..." He began, but didn't continue. He loved it.

She brought out his dick and began stroking. She didn't know what was coming over her, but she couldn't contain it. She didn't want to.

She started off shaky and with no rhythm, but got the hang of it quickly. Soon she was jerking him off with skill.

"Fuck, Alice," Porter moaned.

He suddenly pulled over to the side of the road.

"Fuck," he let out a loud moan once he put the car into park.

He grabbed the back of her head and kissed her when he came. The kiss was powerful at first, but when his cum shot into the air he moaned while his lips were locked.

He came buckets. All landing on his lower stomach. Alice pulled away, they looked at one another for a few seconds, before she went down and licked him clean.

"Where did that come from," he said while trying to catch his breath.

She ignored him, and sat back in her chair before giving herself a few last rubs.

"What do you think about group sex?"

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